|Posted on January 1, 2012 at 1:45 PM|
Happy New Year....
I purposefully left the next entry for today. The topic is New Year's resolutions. And no, I'm not going to talk about how to keep them. That is idiotic. If you're curious, then read on. If you're not curious.....then what the hell are you doing reading this?
The purpose for New Year's resolutions is to effect change in ourselves, our lives, whatever.
As I sit here, watching Titanic the movie, yup chick flick, it occurs to me all those people who were fighting for their lives, just hours before, were probably thinking about problems they were having. Maybe they weren't happy with their looks, their income, their clothes. Maybe, as many were immigrants on the actual ship, they were scared and worried about life in the "free world" of America. Women probably fretted about how they had put on a pound or two. Men, about finances. (I am referring to a time where women were expected to be ladies and men took care of everything.) The point being, when the ship began to sink, when the inevitable conclusion became evident to all, those problems disappeared. Only one thing became important: living.
So when you're making your New Year's resolutions, or even just thinking about the ones you have made, keep this in mind: Just how important will that change be as your life moves on.
If you want to lose weight, is it because of health, looks, pressure from a spouse? Make sure the weight loss will have the effect for yourself, not others.
If you want to quit smoking, is it because of health, money, pressure from society/kids/spouse? How will it affect you mentally? (I ask this because I had quit smoking for 5 1/2 years. The reason was finances. I smoke again. The reason was high stress.)
Whatever your "resolutions" are, make certain the outcome is what will benefit you. See yourself AFTER the change, for if the picture isn't something you want to see, then you might as well not try that resolution. I guarantee you, you will fail.
If your resolutions' outcome will change you for the better as per what you interpret "better" to be, then your chances of success have just tripled. Just because "society" or someone else's interpretation of "better" is out there, isn't the reason to effect changes in your life. Do it for yourself. When you do things to please others, it's you who is left wondering "What about me?".
Sound selfish? It is, if you use society's definition of selfish. But if you use the ACTUAL definition of selfish: devoted to or caring only for oneself; concerned primarily with one's own interests, benefits, welfare, etc., regardless of others. (www.dicitonary.com) , see those last three words? REGARDLESS OF OTHERS. That means you not only put yourself first, you only think of yourself. It is possible to put yourself first AND think of others.
A teacher from my Social Service Worker class back in the early 90's explained it best: How can you help others if you, yourself need help? Make sure you're ok, then you'll be free to help them be ok. (Thanks Anita.)
Look folks, making resolutions is the "fun" thing to do. How many of us don't follow through? And that is OK! But please remember, trying to change or improve yourself for someone else's benefit is BULLSHIT! Do it for you. (And by that I don't mean "quit smoking so I can live longer to see my kids - yeah, what about that truck that may hit you as you're crossing the street next time?)
New Years' Resolutions. What a joke. So tell me, is it quit smoking? Lose weight? Spend more time with the kiddies? Spend more time learning something? Whatever! Please PLEASE tell me, exactly who or what convinced you that January 1st, of any year, is the ONLY day you can start/vow to make that change?
Am I to believe that I can only make changes in my lifestyle that will help me lose weight starting January 1st but on no other day?
If I want to quit smoking, why is it that I should have a higher expectancy of success if I start January 1st rather than, say on June 5th?
Come on people. If there's something about you or in your life that you want to change, then change it. The date isn't important; the realisation that you want to change is important.
There are 364 more days in the calendar year that can be just as good a "start date". (Well, this year, 365. It is a leap year after all.)
So this year, forget the resolutions on January 1st. Wait til January 2nd. Don't let the pressure get to you. If you believe there is something about yourself or your life that needs changing, that you want to change, they why not do it when you want to. It is a "change" so you know it will affect yourself and others. That will never be any different, and you know that. Let's let January 1st go by. I'll guarantee you that the sun will rise tomorrow, and you WILL have another chance to make that change.
Ok now for the flip side. I happen to think New Year's Resolutions, while created by society, are interesting. You get an insight into what people think of themselves. That friend who you think is hot, actually wants to lose a few pounds. That guy that you think is so damned good looking thinks that he needs to work on his pecs. That family member whom you think "has it all" wants to quit smoking because they're afraid of dying too soon, and won't be able to be with their children as long as they want to. So, here my friends, are my resolutions. Read carefully, and if you notice, you will get some insight into who I really am:
1) to maintain my workout sessions for at least 15 minutes four times a week in order to keep my stomach as flat as possible, my upper body muscles firm, and to minimize the appearance of cellulite in my buttocks and ass.
2) to practise my piano playing a minimum of 5 times a week so that I can play the piano at a conservatory level 6 or higher before I am 50.
3) to obtain my motorcyclist's driver license so that I may go anywhere I damn well please, no matter how far, with the feeling that I am not "closed in".
4) to present myself to the public as an "attractive woman", in order to try to attract the attention of a man whom I find attractive as well. Not just mentally, but physically as well. Probably someone from a different area/country. ( I like tall dudes, and at 5'3", I don't think it's all that difficult.) This will be accomplished in a realistic manner. Not with heavy makeup or the "latest fashion", but in a manner tightly embraced by myself; little makeup, sometimes in "nice" clothes. He will have a wonderful sense of humour. His self esteem will fluctuate, just like mine. He will love casual wear, but will acknowledge that formal wear is nice too. His height will be 5'11" or higher. He will NOT be overweight. (I'll be damned if I'm going to have to work bloody hard on staying "trim" while staring at his pot belly and butt cleavage!)
5) to try all those things that I've prejudged as "disgusting", and give them a chance. For example, thong underwear. I've already tried them and they're nothing like I thought. They do not feel like a "wedgy", however I do not look anywhere near as sexy in them as I had hoped I would. Cellulite sucks! So does having short, stumpy legs. One other example is brussel sprouts. Sometime in the year 2012 I will try them, probably boiled or steamed, with a little butter and salt. I hope I don't gag.
And there you have it folks. My New Year's entry, focusing on resolutions. I hope I've given you some insight into this "party" item. That's all it is; something fun to do at parties. Any changes you want to make, can be made whenever you want to, on any day you want to.
Thought of the day: Ever have someone say this to you: You're man/woman is out there. Just be patient.
If you have had this said to you, or if someone does say this to you, no matter who it is, tell them to go fuck themselves.